I feel smaller here

I feel smaller here,


Maybe it's because everything's so much bigger


Including the people.


It's a funny old place,


This country,


There is so much


That they don't tell you about.


I don't care for all the things


I was told I should.


It seems to just slip


Right


By.


Maybe I was lucky


In what part I came to.


Or maybe I'm just lucky


That I'm seeing the world


With haze green specs


Whether I've smoked or not.

There's a hole..

..within my soul, more like a tear it spreads.
My head is sore.
I can't explain the things that drive me mad.
Losing all we worked towards my eyes are glazed and grey.
And lines between the stars intrigue but none know what they mean.
The tear has spread right through my head.
I am useless now.
And smiles and times now gone replace ambitions from my past.
So tell me please how can I be the confident one again.
Must I lose it all before my current life can end?

ffb

@DrTchockII

Sometimes I wish..

..I was one of those people that didn't see anything wrong with self-indulgent cyber-whinging

I still LOVE this song

If I could go back and talk to my young self..

..What might I have to say

To that poor boy with ideals

Far surpassing all others dreams?

I'd say, 'Young boy, you could be

Anything that you wish.

But don't bow down to pressures

Nor place too much on friends.'

And young boy would no doubt have looked down

At his feet and then into my eyes.

And asked 'How can you tell me this

When your life you seem to despise?

And you never bowed to pressure

Nor put too much on friends

And yet your plans aren't working out.

The means haven't met the ends.'

'But plans are fluid concepts

To keep our spirits high.

And no-one knows where they'll end up

In 15 years time.'

'So what's the point of this lesson?'

The young boy might well ask.

'To learn that life is fucked up

And getting through it is the task.'

With this he'd roll his eyes,

Roll his fingers and slink away.

Only to keep forgetting

What he was supposed to do that day.

The days would roll by quickly,

The months and years too.

And one day he would find himself

Trapped in a cocoon

Of thoughts of what could have been

And what there still could be.

Weighing up a compromise

Between a life that could be happy

And fulfilment of those dreams

That are close to being lost.

Self belief is fading fast.

Is compromise worth the cost?

If

IF you can keep your head when all about you 
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise:

If you can dream - and not make dreams your master;
If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools:

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breathe a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: 'Hold on!'

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
' Or walk with Kings - nor lose the common touch,
if neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And - which is more - you'll be a Man, my son!